What’s so different about MLE groups?

It’s difficult to explain just how different a My Life Expedition group is. It’s not just that the material, but the weekly gatherings as well.

MLE groups are not Bible studies, discipleship or life groups. They are spiritual formation groups in which participants learn a new spiritual practice called three-way listening. This is a way of surrendering our own agendas and judgements in order to simply listen to the person sharing, while simultaneously listening to the Holy Spirit as well as noticing what is going on in our own souls. Listening to our own souls means actually noticing when judgements or agendas arise or when something in the speaker’s story activates emotions related to our own story. However, we don’t respond by making it about us, but we still hold our attention on the speaker.

Three-way listening isn’t easy at first, but that’s ok because every week we get another practice. Over time it not only becomes easier, but will also transform us if we let it. In other words, it spiritually forms us; hence the term, “spiritual formation group.”

 Why is this so important?

For the speaker it’s important because MLE groups become a safe space to shed the false self which cares more about image management than authenticity. We can tell we are speaking or acting out of our false self when we begin to choose our words carefully, either trying to get others to think positively about us or to stave off rejection. The purpose of processing aloud in our groups is to be honest with ourselves and God, while experiencing acceptance from others as we do. We don’t have to share anything we choose not to, but what we share must be honest even if messy.

For the listener it’s important because our MLE group becomes a training ground as we learn to be truly present and listen to others even as we are praying in our spirits. We practice actively holding facial expressions and body language that communicate love and acceptance. Most important, we learn to put our trust in God into action by the way we engage others. We trust that He is good and that He desires to work in the lives of those present. We trust that He can and will do more than we could ever do. Thus, we don’t need to fix, advise, control, or manipulate. We learn to be at rest and peace in the midst of other people’s turmoil. We find that we can be a faithful, steady presence to others and that this alone is one of the greatest gifts we can give someone.

If we let it, all of this can spill over into our other relationships. As speakers and listeners, we learn what safety looks and feels like even as we are becoming safe people of faith ourselves.

Please note that I am not implying this is how every group or relationship should operate. Rather, that the majority of us have never experienced a group like this and it can be a new and transforming experience.

If this sounds like something you want to try, consider coming to an information meeting on August 9 @ 9:30AM in person or 6:45 via zoom. Email me at Melissa@JesusExpedition.com to sign up.

Melissa Malami-Jones

Melissa is, above all else, a lover of Jesus, her Lord and King. She has spent almost 20 years in ministry but is now focused on walking with people who desire a closer connection with God. She knows it is God’s desire for every person to experience His great love for them.

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